A Walk in the Park

For as long as I can remember, Blaine’s family always met in the Cypress Hills every summer just after school let out. They all would spend two weeks there. The memories are dear. Blaine would buy the biggest super soaker he could find and one day, without notice, a water fight would break out between him and his nieces and nephews, his kids and of course some of the older kids at heart. Sometimes the kids from other campsites would join in! The days were spent together around the fire that seemed to never go out. We would laugh and visit. The kids all rode their bikes, built forts, went ziplining, swimming and had a blast. When the go cart business started up on the hill there would be an annual family race that took place. Those were the days!

I have known for some time that no one would be coming to Cypress this year. I have had a lot of time to think about today and I have told myself I would be okay. Of course I would. I have survived much in the last couple of years and this is just another change. There have been so many. Sometimes we lie to ourselves. Sometimes we just aren’t ready to face our truth.

Today, the first day of the Canada Day weekend, I was gifted a Tarot reading from Kelli Malcolm. I interviewed her for my podcast and she graciously offered her time. One of the questions I asked her was about these strange symptoms that have been going on for over a week now. At first I thought I was getting a cold because my throat was scratchy. Over the next while I developed a dry cough. I seemed to be having to clear my throat a lot and my voice got raspy. I thought maybe it was allergies because sometimes this time of year I would develop a bit of hay fever but this didn’t feel the same. 

One of the suggestions that came up from the reading was to spend some time relaxing and being in nature and to write. There was something I needed to release.  Now I know that emotional things often can become physical symptoms when we hang on to the energy and I had planned to head to the park anyway, so off I went.

I got the idea to just take a really big walk around the lake so I headed out. As I was leaving my campsite I happened to glance over at the big family that had gathered in the next site. There were many cars parked there and everyone was visiting and laughing and having fun. I suddenly felt very alone in that moment. I heard a question in my head… can you be genuinely happy for those people? Instant tears. I am used to that. I even had kleenex ready! Ha!

As I continued walking there were robins that took turns running ahead of me on the path. The walk is probably about 10 km all together. It was amazing how they just kept calling me forward. Robins remind us to uncover happiness. They are associated with entering a new chapter in our life. Seeing a robin encourages us to let go of the negative affecting our lives and embrace a new and happier phase. Robin as a power animal can help us during times of change. Robin energies wrap you in courage and confidence for embracing whatever waits. 

I thought about how time changes things. You can’t go back. You can only go forward. Day turns to night. Summer will end and then fall will come. If you keep trying to relive the day you had yesterday you are going to miss today.  I also thought about how you have to put your hand out to receive something. If you are holding something else you can’t accept something new. Sometimes we have to just let go! I really needed to let go of this. It’s not going to be like it used to be and that has to be okay. If I am able to put this down and release it, who knows what is possible for me? I can’t fix it. My mind will try, but it can’t take me back to those days. It just cannot. So there is a choice…. Can I be happy for those people? Yes! I can. And I can rejoice along with them that I will also have more days in the park that are full of magic and miracles. They will be so different and beautiful in their own way. I just need to allow them to come and the way to do that is to let go of what was. 

This day was designed just for me… this special day in this special place to be sad and glad and everything in between so that I can release, let go and look forward to what lies ahead. There is gratitude for all that is working for me. I am open to receiving more. What else is possible? Or as Michael Sandler says, “How does it get any better than this?” 

Here I am back at home writing this post. Who knows what has shifted in my physical body? I guess time will tell. I do know that something in me is ready to get back to the park again. I just know there are more adventures waiting for me there. It truly is a beautiful place. Here are some pictures I took on my walk. https://photos.app.goo.gl/VDbiT67Z9R5bWYzT8